Ask Alice

How do you get yourself to stop chasing someone, someone who you pretty much know isn’t interested but always leaves that chance of possibility, that tiny bit of hope dangling right in front you? It can be so easy to talk yourself into the “what if…”

It’s not an easy thing getting over someone, especially if most of your relationship is a fantasy playing in your head 24/7. These scenarios that you have made up in your head can cloud your vision and judgement. “What if…” situations are basically crack and I think it’s time to check into rehab. So here are the doctor’s orders: take a couple doses of some well deserved alone time, read a new book or watch a movie, but try and stay away from the rom-coms category on Netflix. You don’t need to see Matthew McConaughey running to the airport to finally tell the girl that he has always loved her, and this probably won’t get your mind off the one whom we shall not name. But if you aren’t a fan of just relaxing alone then why not make plans to spend time with friends or family just stay away from them, and this includes cyber stalking! Hopefully after some distance your vision will start to clear. Plus, who knows: maybe you will run into Prince Charming during your alone time and you two can ride off into the sunset on his white horse.

I’ve known this girl for a while but we are not quite friends, but I saw her boyfriend on Tinder. They have been together for a year and we hang out with the same people… Should I tell her or just pretend I didn’t see anything?

Not gonna lie, this is a very difficult situation but like always honesty is the best policy. Even if you guys aren’t close you should still tell her the truth. I mean, think about what you would want done if you were in her shoes. Remember to be gentle when telling her what you know; don’t go straight out and accuse him of cheating but also don’t make a joke about it. Just try and casually bring it up. You could bring it up in a conversation and be like: “Hey, I was on Tinder yesterday trying to scope out the hotties and I came across your boyfriend’s profile”. Now, this could end in two ways: she doesn’t know about the profile and she will probably be shocked or even deny it and even accuse you of lying. In this case, don’t get mad. Or, she may laugh it off and be completely fine with it and could even have her own profile on the app. No matter how she reacts in the end, you did your part and tried to help, which gets you a gold star in my book of friendship. 🙂

Alice xox

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