Voldemort for President

by Élisabeth Soubry,

Why He Who Shall Not Be Named is a Better Presidential Candidate than Trump

Those of us who insist that this new generation is devoid of political opinion and involvement should take a brief moment to look at the candidates of the most recent USA presidential election candidates. Namely, Donald John Trump, whose politics have been the laughing stocks of thousands, online and in the media.

His controversial statements make us all hope that he believes the old adage “all publicity is good publicity” (Stanford GSB Staff, 2011) because if it is not the case, he is stuck with quite a bit of talk and very little of it making him look good.

But I, noble readers, bring you the solution. A solid candidate that you should all consider before taking your vote to paper. I present to you Lord Voldemort, also known as Tom Marvolo Riddle, a strong leader filled with good ideas that will better the United States of America more than Trump ever could.

First of all, where Trump raises the controversial topic of guns (On The Issues, 2015), Voldemort brings a solution. Not only does he outlaw these, but instils his weapon of choice (wands) in a fully legislated manner. Not only are wands and their magical emissions carefully looked after, but they do not (generally) kill by accident.

Secondly, Voldemort gives equal chances to all. This is demonstrated as he deems Bellatrix to be his most loyal servant, above the men in the group. This clear lack of discrimination is a statement he places that all are accepted in his ideology. On the other hand, Trump deems women as aesthetically pleasing objects: “Beauty and elegance, whether in a woman, a building, or a work of art, is not just superficial or something pretty to see”(Trump, 2006).

While Donald Trump believes that only English should be spoken in America (The Hollywood Reporter, 2015), Voldemort speaks the double of this, adding to his arsenal the tricky language of Parseltongue. Now, if this does not demonstrate the drive towards diversity of language, I do not know what does.

Voldemort’s drive to kill Harry Potter shows his degree of determination and persistence, which is necessary when dealing with social, cultural and economic problems that America will face. Trump simply does not have that kind of drive as he never had to break his soul or regain his body to take over the world.

Finally, in a point that is of growing concern to you, students, future workers, Voldemort believes in his youth. Not only does he give learning and growing opportunities, such as giving the task of killing Dumbledore to Draco Malfoy when he was still a young student, but he truly believes in their abilities. What better opportunity to push one’s self? Do you see Trump placing his belief in us in this way? I didn’t think so.

Lovely readers, when the time comes to mark off a name with an X, think of He Who Shall Not Be Named and all he brings to the table that Trump simply does not. Make an informed choice. Vote Lord Voldemort.

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