I Beg of You
By Ethan Von Hagopian
Contributor
Look at me, I want you to see me, I beg you at night, and cry when I sleep with no comfort. I call for someone in this life, I call for a better life, for a purpose. I am an amalgamation of intricate feelings of sadness, of loss, of depression, of loneliness, I have lived my life in fear, I have seen those around me fall, I have seen them in their worst moments, I have seen them in their best moments, in times hate and struggle, in times of addiction, in times of strife and worry, in times of fear, in times of battle, in times of mourning and I love those I’ve never even met because they are my world. People in this modern age, could never understand that feeling of being there for a complete stranger, they couldn’t care if a man or woman was dying on the street, an unknown light going out does not concern this world and I will not stand for it anymore! I see this world for what it is, it’s full of loneliness, it’s full of hate, of artificial joy, of ignorance, of despair, of judgement!
You fill yourselves with substance and then cry when you find nothing else in this world has changed! You cry when this world cares not for you, but when you’re given the option of kindness you turn your back! Your logic is wrong! “You are not close to me, so I do not understand nor care for you! You are a complete stranger! A nobody! A nothing! You do not matter to me because I’ve never experienced that kindness either, so why should I be different?!” Why?! Why?! Why do we do this to ourselves?! Why must we destroy the resemblance of humanity that we have?! Why do you bring me to my knees?! Why? Do you want me to beg? “Please. I beg of you. Help me, please. Help me!” So fucking do it! You have no reason not to! I’m asking you! Me! Yet you can’t even stomach the thought! Do you see the problem? Humans as a species are made to care for one another, and yet I have seen those who would not move an inch when they see injustice, rash behavior, violence, rape, genocide, ethnic cleansing, when they see a world that only suffers without growth they sit on their phones and judge through their screens! Do you want to make a message? Do you want it to stop? Perfect, yell. Speak your fucking mind! Stop giving a shit for the judgments around you! Make your own fucking world! Call the goddamn bluff! See what they’ll do!
You want a world to live in? Fight for it with your words! Bring down autocracies using power and influence via word to mouth. Weapons solve nothing, in a world where everything can be bought and sold at the drop of a coin, the world is silenced with weapons. You want to make noise? Stop using weapons, because you’re not seen as silenced, you’re seen as a terrorist! You bleed for a cause that brings nothing! Stop bleeding, stop shooting, stop running into a battlefield to prove your point! I want you to speak! I want you to know, that in this empty world of judgement, that I care for you! When the world goes dark and everything seems out of reach, out of connection, when the world seems like it has lost its humanity. I want you to know that I stand here and instead of waiting for a new world, I write!
“You want a world to live in? Fight for it with your words!”
Get off your fucking phone! Do you want me to beg? Does that make you feel better? I get it life feels less empty on your phone. I get it that this world needs laughs in hardship, it needs smiles when there is only void, it needs light! So what can you do? Do what I’ve been telling you, be free. Live how you want, say what you feel, do things without the absence of a conscience, do things that make you cry, that make you laugh, that make you break down, do it so much you need a break from it! I want you to love your life! Beyond the shadow of a doubt in this self destructive world, take everything from it. Friends, family, love! I want you to take anything you can, any lesson you can, any skill you can, any love you can! I want you to see that it’s worth fighting for! So do it! Speak! I want to show you care! So love your world, always care without context, live without fear and be free.
“I beg you, take my world and be better!”
Anything is better than being silent and living in shackles! Quit being shy, quit saying maybe, quit second guessing unless you know it’s wrong, quit allowing the world to turn to shit! I beg you, take my world and be better! Be free.